I’m currently listening to T.H. White’s The Once and Future King–the first time I’ve experienced the book in probably 20 years. In it, White has a long passage about a “seventh sense” that you develop as you get older: the sense of how the world works. He seems to be talking about the fading of youthful passions, and the cultivation of a kind of cynicism that develops about life that develops after having simply lived it.
But I am finding as I get older that I appreciate more in my life that I once took for granted, most especially time to think about things. Reacting with my mind and superego, instead of my heart and id, I can keep things in better perspective and let go the things that don’t matter so much to me any more.
As a young man, I would have called it getting old, selling out, or losing my edge–inasmuch as I ever had anything close to an edge. From my current vantage point, though, it feels a lot like what I imagine maturity feels like, and so I’m grateful for the chance to experience life with a little bit of balance, consideration, and contemplation.